Episode #24 Your Guest Lists and 17 Tips on Who You Should Invite
Guest lists can be a daunting task or it might be pretty easy. It all depends on what type of ceremony and reception you are having. If you are having a big blowout ceremony and reception you might have an easier time figuring out who to invite than if you are having a small and intimate wedding. We've come up with a few tips that might help you weed out those guest lists according to the type of wedding you are planning.
#1 Discuss with your fiance and come up with an agreeable number, then start a VIP and secondary list.
#2 Whom can't you imagine not being there?
#3 Family, are you close to your cousins, aunts, uncles? Would it cause a huge rift in the family if you weren't to invite? Each family has their own dynamics.
#4 Those you haven't stayed in contact with should go on your secondary list, to go through after your first VIP list.
#5 Add co-workers and friends of your parents to the secondary list.
#6 Depending on who is paying for the wedding, you might give your parents a set number of invitees. Then keep veto power for yourselves.
#7 Don't forget that your friends in the ‘dating' scene will most likely want to bring a date. So make sure to count them in your number.
#8 Decide if you want to make this a kid-friendly event. If you don't make sure that you remember to make note of that in your invitation.
#9 Not inviting a person or persons who sent gifts is acceptable. Sending a thank you note is the right thing to do.
#10 If you've been invited to a friend's wedding, it would be a nice gesture to invite them to your's.
#11 If there is a special family member, aunt, cousin… let them do a toast or recite a poem to make them feel included.
#12 If you receive a RSVP card with an extra guest written in and your wedding is a smaller one, you can call and nicely explain that the guest list is limited.
#13 It is not necessary but would be in good taste to send out wedding announcements to your friends and co-worker if you are having a family only or very intimate wedding.
#14 You do not have to invite all of your co-workers.
#15 If you are receiving a lot of No RSVPs it's ok to then add to your guest list if you want to especially if there are people that you had to leave out for space reasons.
#16 Missed RSVPs can either be put down as a no or you can call and verify. Sometimes people forget and others need a push to make the decision.
#17 If you learn that an invited guest is going through a breakup, there's no need to withdraw the invite.
Another way to work the guest list is to split it into thirds, couple's guests, brides parents and grooms parents.
The Big Wedding: Both VIP and secondary lists, and hey throw in the UPS man as well!
The Small and Intimate Ceremony and a Large Reception: Vip list for the ceremony and add your culled secondary list for the reception.
The Small and Intimate Wedding: Only those on your VIP list.
The Large Ceremony and the Small Reception: VIP and Secondaries for the ceremony and, of course, your VIPs only for your Reception.
Eloping (Elope: run away secretly in order to get married, especially without parental consent) and later Reception/Party: For your elopement, it should be just you two and possibly your best friends. As for the reception, that's a call you have to make on how large you want it to be.
We hope that these tips help you come up with the perfect guest list for your wedding. Remember it is your wedding and it should be what you want it to be.
-Until next time, no stress, no worries, keep calm and listen on-